And if you ask

Life hurts and that sucks.

I feel so bitter and angry.
I feel so empty and sad.
I feel guilty and greedy.

When I see pregnant women, my heart just crumbles a little more and I just want to cry.
This was not supposed to happen. I want my babies back.
I hate not having had control over this situation.

I am so numb.
I just want to feel again.
Happiness seems so hard to get.
I can't even get out of bed.
I drag myself to work, I just don't seem to be able to care.
I just want to curl up and die.

And if you ask,
I'll tell you:
I am doing fine.

Life sucks, and that hurts!